MONSTER’S LOG: THURSDAY, JUNE 2

[Bring it, sun.]

I found this Internet Page yesterday, and it reinforced my awesomeness two-fold. Firstly, I love the sun and I’m not about to hide from it. Haven’t you ever seen me guarding the gates of my palace from punk-ass pigeons and dainty dogs? If you look really closely, you’ll also witness brilliant rays of Vitamin D caressing my mane.

Secondly, not bragging or anything, but a few summers ago I had romantic relations with a number of the cats on that same Internet Page. Specifically #1, #4, #6, #7 and #9. It’s true that #8 and I saw each other a few times but she just couldn’t kick the cat nip habit.